I did not even realize it was the third week already and totally missed my day. Sheesh, this is harder than I thought it would be!
Thank you all for your birthday wishes. It was a very bittersweet day for me. Brandon is an amazing husband and surprised me with all our family over for dinner, and someone else brought it, so I didn't have to cook. I have one amazing husband.
But it was all very difficult day as well. As I was getting ready, my Relief Society president called to tell me that one of the sisters I visit had her three month old baby pass away. They think it was SIDS. They just went to get her up and found her not breathing. She was declared dead at the hospital. This is their first baby, and she was such a big spirit. From the time she was born she was wide eyed and smiling. And they are the sweetest couple. He is actually our home teacher as well.
It has been so sad as I think of their loss, and it has brought up a lot of my own sorrow as well. We just celebrated Rachel's 1st birthday last month. As I was cleaning up their house that day, I kept looking at all the darling pictures they had up, and thinking of the few that we have up if Rachel. There is so much sorrow, it really is hard to express. But at the same time there is so much joy as well. Each child that comes down to this earth is sent lovingly from our Heavenly Father. He does not make mistakes. I know that He sends His children to specific families for specific reasons. And some children have a short mission in this life. Every life is so precious, and we all have a divine destiny. I know that we are eternal beings, and mortality is just one short act of our lives. And I am so grateful for how my life has been touched by these amazing spirits that only need to be in this life for such a short time.
Take advantage of each day that you are given. None of us know the future, only God. Don't let yourself get into the mindset of, "I'll be happier when..." or "I'll do it later". Live the life that God has given you, and find joy in it. Even in the depths of sorrow, the joy of the gospel and the gift of the atonement shine through.
Michelle,
ReplyDeleteThis was heart wrenching to read. It would be very painful to lose a child! You will be a great support to your friend. Having her first pass away would leave her feeling incredibly empty. Maybe it doesn't matter which child it is, but I imagine losing a first would be so saddening! You have a great perspective. My thoughts are with you and your family and Rachel and also your friend's family!
Michelle, I learn so much from you. I truly appreciate how your comments and thoughts are always focused on the gospel and the Savior. You are a great example to everyone who knows you, through your quiet faithfulness and testimony. I love to see these pictures of Rachel- what a beautiful baby! Hugs!
ReplyDeleteI've been thinking a lot about this today. A dear lady I knew in California passed away last night after about a years battle with cancer. About a month ago I learned that a girl from my byu married ward also passed away from cancer. Both women were so vibrant and full of life and both left behind two children and a husband. My heart breaks for these two families. Sometimes life is very sobering with its reality. But I know God is good and that He loves His children. I'm reminded of this especially when I look at one of my cute little Sunbeam boys. We don't see him often at church as he only comes when he is living with his grandma which happens when his drug addicted parents sporadically drop him off. We were talking about Jesus in class and this little boy pipes up with a story about how Jesus came and got him in the forest and helped him find his family. It was pretty special and reaffirmed to me how the Saviour is watching over us, especially in our hour of need. Anyways, sorry for rambling. Life is pretty hard sometimes but I know we have a very personal saviour there for us the whole way.
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